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Thursday, 23 June 2016

YOUR FIRST PILATES MAT, REFORMER AND BARRE EXPERIENCE



We know that your first Pilates class can be a little daunting, unnerving and a little strange, but we promise that once you complete the class you will be hooked! Here are a few very funny but true thoughts that may rush through your mind during your first Pilates Mat, Reformer and Barre experience. 


MAT

  • Pilates sounds a bit like a made-up word to me....
  • Isn't Pilates just stretching? 
  • I can lie down for most of the class? This will be a breeze!
  • Two minutes later - why are my abs on fire!? I'm still lying down, how can this be so difficult?
  • I feel like the most uncoordinated person in this class. Why does everyone look so graceful except for me?!
  • When the hell do I exhale and inhale?! Why am I doing it the wrong way round?
  • What is this 'Hundred' and why does the instructor love it so much?
  • Oh great time for arms, this will be much easier than abs...
  • One minute later- I'm still lying down, why are my arms killing me?!
  • What is this 'Clam' exercise and why is it so incredibly painful on my bottom when I'm barely moving my leg?!
  • Why does the instructor keep smiling and laughing at us as she/he makes us do more reps?! I hate them.
  • End of class - I love the instructor. I love Pilates. I loved every single bit of that class. I feel lengthened, more flexible and energised. I've completely forgotten about the pain I was in during the exercises and will continue to until I wake up tomorrow when it will hurt to cough, sneeze or move in general. 


REFORMER

  • Why am I working out on a medieval torture device?
  • What strap do I use? 
  • What do those crazy spring things at the bottom of the reformer mean?
  • Ooo yay the instructor said just to put on 1 spring- this will be easy. 
  • One minute later- arghhhh my abs burn!
  • When the hell do I exhale and inhale?! Why am I doing it the wrong way round?

  • She wants me to put my feet in the straps?! But I'll fall off this stupid reformer bed!
  • Feet get placed into the straps- oh this is really nice and relaxing...two minutes later- my inner thighs are on fire!
  • The instructor says we are jumping now - this will be fun! 
  • Two minutes later- why does this hurt so much?!
  • How can arm exercises with the straps be more painful than lifting weights?!
  • Oh great, leg presses on the footbar, I will be great at these as I have strong legs. 
  • 30 seconds in- I can barely move the machine! How many springs are attached to this thing- 50? Oh no the instructor says just 4....they are lying. 
  • End of class - That was such a low-impact but intense class. I feel toned already! Mhy joints weren't affected, these crazy little muscles were isolated and I just lay down on my back and sat for most of the time. I love this crazy bed/machine! 

BARRE

  • How painful can this class be when all you have to do is hold onto the ballet barre and bend your knees?
  • Oh crap, the instructor says we can't hold onto the barre...
  • I have strong legs, I'll be fine with these Plies and Squats.
  • Two minutes later - why are we still doing Plies? I hate them! My legs are so weak!
  • I thought I was rather coordinated and a rather good dancer until I started this class...
  • My quads are shaking and now the instructor wants me to lift up onto my toes? I'll just cheat and lift my heels a centimetre off the floor.
  • Why am I sweating bullets?! Why is my heart rate up, I'm just doing Pilates after all. I thought I was fit!
  • When do I breathe? I have no time!
  • Oh bugger, the instructor just came over and lifted my heels higher...how did she see that?!
  • Why are my gluts/bottom muscles burning after just a few reps of balancing on one leg? 
  • Time for arms- how hard can they be with free light weights?
  • Two minutes later - my arms are in agony! Why are we doing so many reps?!
  • Ab time- hopefully we will get to lie down...oh yay a ball, maybe we get to lie on it and relax....nope the ball is making my abs burn!
  • Stretching time! Why is the instructor making me move as I stretch?! Just let me lie here
  • End of class - wow 50 minutes went so fast! I feel so fit and so happy that is over! In fact, I feel so happy that I have completely forgotten how hard and painful that class was and will be back in a few days! 


Adapted from http://www.shape.com/fitness/trends/12-thoughts-you-have-during-your-first-pilates-class, https://agirlnamedwanda.files.wordpress.com/2015/03/exercise-would-be-so-much-more-rewarding-if-calories-screamed-in-agony-as-you-burned-them-f568c1.png

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